Woof

[plushaeusrumpified]

WHO: Bro and Murdoc
TONE: Rainbows
RATING: PG13 because Bro
WHEN: RIGHT NOW
WHERE: Murdoc's prissy pureblood palace
WHAT: Bro is a dumbass
STATUS: Ongoing

[Being alone was hard. He'd thought the few school breaks during the semester were difficult, but Summer? Man, that was the worst. When you were so damn used to having someone and then trying to adjust to not being around them every day, it was really goddamn hard. It tended to make someone do stupid things.

Like buy animals.

He had a reason, though! He was walking down the street and it was just there. And the first thing he'd thought of was Murdoc when he looked into it's face. How, he isn't sure. Because Murdoc is far from adorable like that. He's just adorable in his own way. His own sexy, beautiful way and goddamn he really missed the guy. So when he saw the dog, it was as if he absolutely had to get it. He was aware of how dumb and borderline cliche it was, but that didn't stop him. He could pass that off as irony.

Bro was pretty damn sure Murdoc would love it. How could you not? It was fucking tiny and adorable and could fit in the palm of your hand. What wasn't to love? So after a rather traumatizing apparation to Murdoc's house, he stood outside of the door. The dog was kind of shaky because of it, but he was pretty sure it'd be fine after a moment.

Without hesitation, Bro knocks on the door, before moving to hold the puppy behind his back.]

Comments

[wwistful]

[Murdoc casts a glance over his shoulder as Bro responds, knowing he's getting an unimpressed look for a harmless comment. Bro has said much nastier things, and really, everyone knows Murdoc's place is bigger and better.

He rolls his eyes at him, but he turns and steps toward Bro, holding out Napoleon as he does.]

But you've already bought me somethin', see? [He raises an eyebrow at him, moving Napoleon forward so the two are touching noses.] What's another house elf on top of such a generous gift? [You cannot resist the combined powers of Murdoc and a puppy, Bro. Let it gooo.]

I don't think I ever said thank you, now that I think about it. [He smiles a little wider.] I love you. [At this point, Napoleon is going to lovingly thrust his tongue up Bro's nostril.]

[plushaeusrumpified]

[Bro lets out a grump noise as the dog is thrust in his face, but he doesn't pull away. Still, he can't help but be a little put out right now, considering he just dropped a fair bit of money on the dog and Murdoc insulted his house. Sure, Murdoc's place is bigger, but that doesn't mean it's better. Bro's house is nice and lived in and full of beautiful things like puppets. Murdoc's is kind of stuffy and reeks of rich boy syndrome.]

Yeah, and I might be starting to regret it, 'cuz not only were you an asshole, now you're getting greedy.

[Bro rolls his eyes and is about to respond when he gets the tongue up his nose and he recoils irritably.]

You're welcome.

[wwistful]

[Bro, you know you make a hell of a lot of jabs. Murdoc is still finding his feet with having a sense of humor, he's just trying to be more Stridery in a pretentious, condescending way.]

You don't regret it one bit. [He corrects him because he's clearly wrong, grimacing at the dog and moving to place him on the ground between them.]

Don't. [His voice is low and it's pretty obvious he's used to training puppies into proper gentlemen, but he drops the act as soon as he's back on Bro's level. With both hands free, he can reach for Bro's and place them on his waist (which is really just code for touch my butt) and leans down to give him a proper kiss with no tongue up the nose.]

[plushaeusrumpified]

[Yeah he may make jabs, but it's never toward the man's house. Usually. Okay maybe he has, but it's still hard for him not to take it at least a little personally, when he's done such a nice thing as this. Gosh. He grumbles a response and raises an eyebrow as Murdoc puts the pooch down and scolds it. Wow, how commanding. Any dog would listen to that tone.

He lets out a sigh as Murdoc moves over to him and places his hands on his waist. He knows exactly what Murdoc wants, and slowly he moves his hands to the ass like Murdoc wants. He won't deny it's a great ass and feels so good after all this time, but he's still a little burned from the comment.

And that burn is slowly cooling as he feels Murdoc's lips on his own, and he lets out a small, content noise before pulling away, though still close enough for their noses to touch.]

You think you can just kiss me and I'll forget all about that little jab?

[wwistful]

[To be fair, Murdoc would appreciate Bro's house a lot more if he hadn't been humped out of it so quickly. It's endearing and it smells like him and it's full of things that remind him of Bro. He does sort of envy the smaller, more personal size of the place. He'd deny it, of course, but the size and age of his house both makes him lonely and just a little burdened with family legacy. He'd have to dig deep to begin to admit any of that, so he'd rather they move on.

Murdoc hums in approval as Bro's hands move downward, he presses a little closer when he's kissed back and shuts his eyes for the moment. He drapes his arms around Bro's shoulders and nuzzles a little more into the touch.]

Yes. [He answers curtly, lips curling upward into a smirk.]

[plushaeusrumpified]

[THOSE particular feelings are ones he would very much like to unearth one of these days. He imagines if he did, it might be a lot easier for their respective families to come together and find a suitable place to live for the both of them. Mainly Dirk and Dave, who really don't want to live here. Maybe buying a new place really could be beneficial for the two of them...

But alas, it's obviously a thing to discuss at a later date.

He rolls his eyes at the comment and shakes his head, leaning in to nip at that frustratingly delicious bottom lip of Murdoc's before pulling back and looking him in the face.]

You're either really overconfident in your kissing, or you just don't want to deal with the fallout of your tactlessness. I'm actually betting it's a little of both.

[And just then, there's a smell...

And Bro just gives him a cheeky grin.]

Did I mention he ain't potty trained?

[wwistful]

[Eventually they’ll get down to the nitty gritty business behind why they haven’t already moved in. There are a lot of issues to touch on there! Commitment issues, fear, children and really just the unpleasant business of moving and the discussions and compromises that follow it. At the very least, it’s a truth universally acknowledged that weeks away from each other are good for inspiring changes of heart as far as finding a place where they can be together goes.

Murdoc lets out a rough sounding sort of chuckle as Bro nips, laughing really isn’t his bit and he really fails to sound endearing or adorable when he does. It always manages to make him sound perverse, which he supposes with Bro it isn’t too far from how he feels.]

You know what they say about assumptions. [He pokes at his chest. Ass- You – Me. Geddit? Assume? Yeah, he’s funny.

Murdoc scowls as Bro grins, stepping out of the embrace and wasting no time bending down to scold poor Napoleon. Training starts now, apparently.]

You’re goin’ to clean that up, I hope you know. [He lifts the puppy upward again.] You’ll both sleep outside if he does it again, for that matter.

[plushaeusrumpified]

[And along with that, eventually they will also realize that their issues are stupid and that they belong together forever. Really, they just need to quit being dumb and acknowledge the fact they're stuck with each other forever.

But first they have to deal with that small, obvious little problem. That smell ain't getting any fainter.]

Yes I've never heard that one before. [You're so original, Murdoc, hurrhurr.]

Excuse me, though? Last I checked this was your dog. It ain't my responsibility what it does once it leaves my hands. So I think it's your job to pick up the stank pile, daddy-o.

[wwistful]

I never asked for a dog! Surely you don't intend to leave me to do all of the care taking when it's clearly an indication of.. [Commitment...] Teamwork.

[He stares at him for a second before picking the little bundle of fluff up and holding it away from him.] Perhaps if you hadn't fired one of my elves we wouldn't have this issue. Regardless, I'm sure one of them will be in the kitchen. [Which is another way of saying 'hurry up I want cake'.]

[plushaeusrumpified]

[Yes, it would be pretty damn selfish of him to leave Murdoc with all the work, but. This is poop. He dealt with enough poop when Dirk and Dave were babies. He's really not in the mood to deal with it anymore.]

How about you deal with the shit and I deal with... whatever the fuck else there is.

[Or... Yeah, you know what. A house elf can do it. Whatever.]

I didn't fire it. Besides, he seemed pretty fuckin' keen to get out of here, so it ain't really my fault. [He's heading towards the kitchen though, shaking his head.] I can't believe you really want a house elf to pick up dog shit. That just reeks of abuse of power.

[wwistful]

[It very well would be! If Bro can't tend to the messes their dog makes, how can he ever trust him to keep a house tidy?

He shakes his head at Bro, frowning in disapproval.] There's plenty else involved, but I highly doubt you're at all versed in the art of dog training. Did you even bring food for him?

[He quirks a curious brow, following Bro into the kitchen.] It's their job to clean, I hardly see how it could be an abuse. Honestly, if it bothers you so you're welcome to replace them and clean for them, seein' as how you're so eager to let them go.

[plushaeusrumpified]

[You know, he honestly wants to say yes. Yes he totally brought dog food and Murdoc is silly for doubting him. The only problem?

He forgot. He forgot and he hates himself for it because he can't rub it in Murdoc' face. He's half tempted to cast a nonverbal accio- no, nevermind. He isn't tempted to do it at all, because he really doesn't want Murdoc's house to be buried under dog food. It would be like getting snowed in, but with dog food and he just. Nope. Not going to happen.]

So I forgot dog food, it doesn't mean I'm bad at raising dogs. Geez. You can feed him some of the cake you were molesting.

[He rolls his eyes.]

I barely clean my own house, I'm not turning into your servant too. It doesn't bother me THAT much.

[wwistful]

Dogs can't eat chocolate. [He says ever so matter-of-factly. Surely the dog expert would be aware of that much!]

I suppose Bickie will just have to share until we can find something more suitable. I imagine it won't need much more than a few spoonfuls. [Which would have been a tragic loss to his cake.] And I was not molesting it.

[He crinkles his nose at Bro, setting Napoleon on the floor of the kitchen so he can skitter around while Murdoc looks for what's important.] I could tell that the instant I walked in, actually. It might not bother you but I have to keep a certain amount of elves in order to maintain such a big home, you know.