SWIMMINGGEDDON.

[wwistful]

WHO: Murdoc Donoghue and YOU
TONE: Fun, WHIMSICAL, horrifying
RATING: PG-13 and onward
WHEN: September 7th
WHERE:  The Lake.
WHAT:  After this Murdoc realised the children (and staff) of Hogwarts were in dire need of swimming lessons.
STATUS: Ongoing

[GATHER AROUND CHILDREN it's a warm summer day and the lake is perfect for diving into your sudden but inevitable deaths. You should all be dressed in your swimming trunks (which you clearly have don't even lie) because Murdoc sure is. He's determined to conduct this in the best manner he can, though he wasn't quite expecting the turn out to be so large. People who can swim are welcome to become his assistants because he could probably use the help.]

Comments

[wwistful]

You're too skinny to be a seal, no shark would be interested in takin' a bite, that's for sure.

[givesyouaboner]

Okay, that's good. I'll never let myself get fatter so I won't ever be mistaken for one.

[wwistful]

You're goin' to grow bigger eventually, you know.

[givesyouaboner]

How do you know I don't have some sort of genetic anomaly that would make me small forever?

[wwistful]

I'm sure someone would have told me. Besides, there are spells to make you bigger.

where gona get this log to 1k

[givesyouaboner]

They wouldn't tell you if they didn't know either! Magic'ing me into a bigger size isn't natural, Prof.

where makin it hapen

[wwistful]

Your cousin and your uncle grew up fine, I'm sure you'll follow suit.

[givesyouaboner]

I hope so. Maybe one day I'll grow up and be really tall like Uncle Dirk.

[wwistful]

[Staring.] He isn't particularly tall, you know. [Oops, Murdoc is taller.]

[givesyouaboner]

_{[Staring back.]}

He seems plenty tall to me.

[wwistful]

He's shorter than a good deal of the staff.

[He nods knowingly.]

[givesyouaboner]

He's taller than a lot of people too.

[wwistful]

A lot of people are younger than him.

[givesyouaboner]

True, but I'm specifically talking about adults. Once you hit a certain age, it has no bearing on your height.

[wwistful]

I suppose so. We're all dwarfed under that oaf of a potions teacher, in any case.

[givesyouaboner]

Oh. Yeah. He's like freakishly tall.

[wwistful]

He is, it's bloody ridiculous. S'probably part giant, too.

[givesyouaboner]

Is that biologically possible?

[wwistful]

It unfortunately and most certainly is.