SWIMMINGGEDDON.

[wwistful]

WHO: Murdoc Donoghue and YOU
TONE: Fun, WHIMSICAL, horrifying
RATING: PG-13 and onward
WHEN: September 7th
WHERE:  The Lake.
WHAT:  After this Murdoc realised the children (and staff) of Hogwarts were in dire need of swimming lessons.
STATUS: Ongoing

[GATHER AROUND CHILDREN it's a warm summer day and the lake is perfect for diving into your sudden but inevitable deaths. You should all be dressed in your swimming trunks (which you clearly have don't even lie) because Murdoc sure is. He's determined to conduct this in the best manner he can, though he wasn't quite expecting the turn out to be so large. People who can swim are welcome to become his assistants because he could probably use the help.]

Comments

[moveslikejaeger]

Pft, like Hy em really here for de lessons. [He rolls his eyes, waving a hand dismissively.] Hy em here to be seen.

Und now, Hy em beink seen vit hyu! Don' hyu chust feel lucky? [grins sharply, giving Herbert's knee a nudge]

[preanimator]

[Herbert jerks his knee back as if he's been burned] No! I don't want anyone thinking I associate with you! God, what if they think we're friends or something?

[Yeah, Herbert. That's totally gonna happen.]

[moveslikejaeger]

Hyu mean de hott attack de gonna get vhen it hits dem dot hyu got friends?

[preanimator]

I have friends! [Friend. Who is currently talking with someone else, probably one of the other Slytherins. Herbert's eyes jerk briefly to Eriq, then away again.] Anyway, they can all have heart attacks for all I care. I just don't want anyone thinking you got your idiocy all over me.

[moveslikejaeger]

Ho no, dey ain't gonna tink dot. [he chuckles a bit, then his eyes narrow, lips curling with mischievous intent] Not 'less dey ketch me doin... DIS! [And then he lunges over, bodily forcing Herbert to the ground and pinning him in place with a growl] Hoo! Iz dot a vand in hyu pents, or iz hyu heppy to see me~?

[It should be worth noting, Herbert's not the only one with a bit of wood in his pants]

[preanimator]

[The smaller boy's eyes go wide and frightened as his glasses are knocked askew and he's shoved to the ground. No mater how many times he gets hit or kicked or jumped on, he never quite get used to it or be stoic about it, which makes it even more of a wonder that he never shuts his mouth to avoid this kind of thing.]

GET OFF ME! GET OFF ME RIGHT NOW! [Herbert's voice cracks a little on the 'now', and he starts struggling wildly, which isn't doing very much to alleviate the lump in his trousers that has nothing to do with magic. He's overcome with a horrible surge of panic, humiliation, and shame, because part of it does feel good, and part of him is noticing Maxim is turned on and is morbidly fascinated by that fact in as much as he's completely confused by it.] YOU OVERGROWN IMBECILE!