SWIMMINGGEDDON.

[wwistful]

WHO: Murdoc Donoghue and YOU
TONE: Fun, WHIMSICAL, horrifying
RATING: PG-13 and onward
WHEN: September 7th
WHERE:  The Lake.
WHAT:  After this Murdoc realised the children (and staff) of Hogwarts were in dire need of swimming lessons.
STATUS: Ongoing

[GATHER AROUND CHILDREN it's a warm summer day and the lake is perfect for diving into your sudden but inevitable deaths. You should all be dressed in your swimming trunks (which you clearly have don't even lie) because Murdoc sure is. He's determined to conduct this in the best manner he can, though he wasn't quite expecting the turn out to be so large. People who can swim are welcome to become his assistants because he could probably use the help.]

Comments

[rule_britannia]

You may have noticed this isn't where you're from, Jones. We do things differently here.

And no, I don't believe I shall.

[allamericanreject]

...For someone so smart you'd think this sort of thing would interest you.

[Alfred rolled his eyes. Then again, what interest did Arthur need to have on Muggles? Whatever.]

I think the thing I'd miss most is you. I've been pretty alright with people graduating...but I'd miss seeing you around.

[rule_britannia]

We're not yet at a stage in what I am tentatively calling a friendship for your attempts at flattery to have any effect.

[Really? You've seen the sweets he has on the train at the beginning of the year and the books he reads. Arthur likes Muggles. Usually. He doesn't sound pissy anymore, he's just being.. normal]

So don't waste your breath.

[allamericanreject]

Good, I wasn't trying to flatter~ I'm just...talking.

[He leeeans back, looking at Arthur with a stupid grin on his face.]

It's nice you call it friendship though! Now I'll have to work on the tentative part.

[rule_britannia]

Don't draw too much attention to it, I might change my mind.

[He smirks slightly, but it's not an unkind expression]

[allamericanreject]

What would you like to draw attention to instead? I mean I'd ask you to swim with me, but...hm. You made it pretty clear you don't want to.

[His attention is turned back out to the lake.]

Do you think there's anything living in there? I mean sure there's rumors, but...

[rule_britannia]

Of course there's something living in there. The Giant Squid, for one. You can't tell me you've been at the school this long and you don't know that.

[allamericanreject]

...Really? I mean is it really real?

[Alfred knows it is, but he's just been AVOIDING THE THOUGHT, because it sort of intimidates him. And is also part of why he hasn't just taken a dive right into the water.]

Because if it is why would people be swimming in the lake?! Aren't they scared??

[rule_britannia]

Of course it's real!

[Arthur can tell it's bothering him... which is of course why he's continuing to talk about it]

Maybe they're just braver than you.

[allamericanreject]

I'm brave! It's just...dangerous, and I don't want anyone hurt! It isn't about courage...

[Oops, don't mind him trying to avoid the accusation. Maybe he's not as much of a hero as he thinks he is.]

[rule_britannia]

You bloody twerp, do you actually think they'd let us swim in the lake if the Squid, or anything else in there, was going to cause us any problems that we couldn't get ourselves out of?

[allamericanreject]

I'm not a twerp, you're a twerp!

[Alfred pouts as he's name-called, and makes it obvious too.]

And hey, I dunno. They sure do have a forest with weird shit in it, don't they?

[rule_britannia]

Yes, Alfred, the Forbidden Forest. Which is forbidden. Because it's fucking dangerous.

[He rubs his temple and scowls]

God, even for a muggle-born you're--

[Wait. Nope. N o p e. Arthur turns red, and immediately walks away]

[allamericanreject]

...What, ignorant? Go on, say it. I mean, you aren't wrong--[Erk, he's walking away...] Or don't. Later.

[Feelings, what feelings? No feelings. Nope.

...except sort of.]

I guess I should know better. Danger's everywhere and the professors tend to protect us. I shouldn't be scared of a squid.

[He also shouldn't be talking to anyone, Arthur's walking away. But it is more to himself...because that whole muggle-born distinction did sting a bit.]