SWIMMINGGEDDON.

[wwistful]

WHO: Murdoc Donoghue and YOU
TONE: Fun, WHIMSICAL, horrifying
RATING: PG-13 and onward
WHEN: September 7th
WHERE:  The Lake.
WHAT:  After this Murdoc realised the children (and staff) of Hogwarts were in dire need of swimming lessons.
STATUS: Ongoing

[GATHER AROUND CHILDREN it's a warm summer day and the lake is perfect for diving into your sudden but inevitable deaths. You should all be dressed in your swimming trunks (which you clearly have don't even lie) because Murdoc sure is. He's determined to conduct this in the best manner he can, though he wasn't quite expecting the turn out to be so large. People who can swim are welcome to become his assistants because he could probably use the help.]

Comments

[wwhatevver]

[All that he's getting from that is a loud huff. He stays quiet for the most part, idly looking around. Whenever Murdoc finally spoke again, Eridan replied with a real snide attitude.]

A course she did. We might not -obwiously- like each other, but I'm not gonna throw the first punch to a girl.

[wwistful]

[He's going to huff right back. Two can play at that game, boy.]

What exactly IS IT that started the fight? You didn't run your mouth, did you?

[wwhatevver]

[MORE HUFFS.]

I said what I had to. I told her to watch where she was goin' and she showed me into a wall and it just escalated real quick as soon as she did that.

[wwistful]

[He hums thoughtfully.]

Should I talk to her?

[wwhatevver]

[He actually puts a little bit of thought into his answer, coming out with a big---]

No.

[wwistful]

Somethin' is goin' to have to come of it, you know that, lad.

Maybe I should talk to Miss Matteris.

[wwhatevver]

I know. I know... I know. I just.

[And there he goes, burying his face and draping himself more.]

Ewerythin' hurts.

[wwistful]

It'll work out. An' when you heal, I'll teach you how to fight properly.

[He jostles Eridan gently.]

Nearly there.

[wwhatevver]

I know how to fight, she just kicked the crap outta me and wouldn't stop after I was on the ground. She's dangerous as hell.

[Yep well he's just going to settle down again closing his eyes for the rest of the walk, because honestly he finds this all really comforting. He grows silent for a few minutes before he realizes something, mentally smacking himself for it. ]

I'm pretty sure I'm gonna need a new pair of glasses.

[wwistful]

An' you're positive you did nothin' to spark this violence? You didn't say anythin or do anythin' stupid? She just started hittin' you?

[And he's perfectly okay with this, though he can feel his back twinging ever so slightly.]

Can't fix the ones you have?

[wwhatevver]

I just... I told her to watch out. She ran right into me.

[Yes sir, continue to stretch the truth. ]

... I really liked that pair. I mean, I can get by with my other ones, but the ones I had were real nice.

[wwistful]

Eridan.

[This is the voice of someone unconvinced with you. Finally, he trudges into the infirmary, earning himself some incredulous looks from the nurses considering he's half naked. He sets Eridan down on the bed and lets a nurse hover over to fuss.]

Do you have your wand on you?

[wwhatevver]

Whaaaat? I'm bein' serious.

[Gosh.

Anyways, when they finally get him into the infirmary and get him down on the bed, he continues looking up at his dad, eye going a bit wide at the question.]

Uh...

[He curses under his breath as he slightly fights over the nurse for a moment to pat himself down to look for it. Oh wherever did it go? He knows he had it on him.

Wait.

There we go there's the wand.]

Got it.

[wwistful]

Hand it over.

[He holds out his hand for the wand.]

[wwhatevver]

[He's skeptical...]

...

[Slowly handing it over.]

[wwistful]

[Eridan you are a dumb. Murdoc takes his wand and gives it a flick.]

Accio Eridan's glasses. [And sure enough, they come flying into the room and Murdoc catches them, inspecting the damage.]

Easily fixed.

[wwhatevver]

[He's just gonna... slowly put a hand to his face.


Dear lord is he a dumbass of the highest caliber right now.]

I wasn't ewen thinkin'... Ugh. Sorry.

[wwistful]

I'll assume you sustained some head injuries.

[Tapping the glasses.] Oculus Reparo.

[wwhatevver]

Yeah she did kick me a few times one of those kicks probably ran right into my head or somethin' haha...

[Just... watching and still getting fussed over.]

[wwistful]

And you don't want me to discuss it with her? At all?

[He folds his glasses, placing them on the side table as the nurses fuss over him.]</small

[wwhatevver]

Why not just... take my word for it?

[He's already tired of being fussed at enough. Nurses and their fussing.]

[wwistful]

Why not just give me some form of solution so I don't have to stand here and feel useless? I might be your father but I sure as hell can't allow either of you to get away with fightin'.

[wwhatevver]

[Okay, he sits up a bit, there's something that stuck out that he's going to just dive into.]

W-wait wait a... wait a second. [He points a finger.] You feel useless? You didn't just get your ass kicked.

[wwistful]

No. I didn't. I was out there [GESTURING.] fussin' with other kids while you were off pickin' fights with half blind girls!

[wwhatevver]

[Oop, balling his fists into the sheets now.] I wasn't pickin' any god damned fight with her!