I believe in a thing called love

[wwistful]

WHO: Murdoc, Bro and Rhys
TONE: Horrifying (Hilarious)
RATING: PG-13 to R?? It's these three.
WHEN: Feb 10th onward
WHERE:  The halls
WHAT: Bro and Murdoc are great egg daddies, Rhys gets a whiff of the love potion and has eyes for Murdoc.
STATUS: Ongoing

[Murdoc had no intention of participating in the activities. It seemed like a silly waste of time and honestly, this sort of thing rarely ends well in Hogwarts. He really doesn't want to turn into a lady or a pirate again. He'll never live it down if it happens again. It's embarrassing enough that students still mutter 'yarr' under their breath when they think he isn't listening.

However, when Bro greeted him with the egg baby in his arms he could hardly say no, could he? He still owes Bro a bit of focused attention after hurting his feelings so badly and quietly, he feels like this could be a nice way to grow even closer to his boyfriend. If they can trust each other with an egg baby, surely their relationship will develop even further in a pleasing way. They've already named it, too. Their egg is called Celia and everything is going swimmingly.

They're walking together down the halls, Murdoc listening as Bro recounts his day for him. He's carrying the egg for now, and he's being as attentive as possble as he does. Until he sees Rhys, and he feels the great urge to toss Celia at him. However, he needs to swallow his hatred and pause for a moment as he feels the egg rustling in his hands.]

Ah! It's movin'! [He exclaims, looking both excited and terrified.] I think it's about to hatch!! [It's actually kind of strange how hyped up he's getting.]

Comments

[higherthaneverybody]

[Rhys hasn't been involved in the raising of eggs at all, though he has been somewhat amused by the antics of the various students in regards to them. He was surprised to learn that some of the teachers were participating, but it hadn't held any particular appeal to him - the only person he could see wanting to pair up with him was Dolores, and he wasn't sure he wanted to spend his time with her watching over a little egg.

Seeing Bro and Murdoc walking down the hall and then Murdoc having his little excitable moment was pretty funny, though, and a decent distraction from his current crop of worries.]

Are you about to be a father? Again? [smirking]

[plushaeusrumpified]

[Bro himself is also weirdly excited about the idea of the egg hatching. He's jumped on this with a large amount of enthusiasm. It meant spending more time with Murdoc, and at the same time it also meant seeing how he raised babies. That alone was fucking worth it for various reasons. Like the fact it could potentially prove to be pretty amusing- though only in the most affectionate of ways. He was also just pretty curious to see how Murdoc is with babies- well. Okay, it isn't a baby, but it still counts. And Bro has been treating it like one.

He's even tried putting shades on it at one point. Because goddamn it the baby needs shades!

Bro isn't expecting it to hatch so soon though, and when Murdoc says that his eyebrows shoot up. It shouldn't hatch in the halls! That isn't safe. He's prepared somewhere for it to hatch. But it's looking like it's too late- and then Rhys of all people is there and he forgets for the moment about it.]

Who invited you to the birth of our baby? I sure didn't.

[wwistful]

[Murdoc can't decide whether to be so excited that nothing else matters or fiercely protective of the strange little egg that happens to be hatching. However, Bro seems to have the protective part down so he's just going to draw the egg closer to his chest and feign disinterest despite the fact that he can't unwiden his eyes as he stares down at it.

It's ridiculous to be this excited, he supposes he and Bro might both be suffering empty nest syndrome. Their children are of a considerable age now, of course. Then again, the fact that they're both absolute idiots might play into why they're so excited for an egg to hatch.

He hunches a little and crinkles his nose, but he stays silent as the nose slowly pushes through the shell of the egg.]

[higherthaneverybody]

Your baby? [Rhys asks, completely undeterred by the cold shoulder he's getting. Bro and Murdoc are so ridiculously juvenile at times, he can't help but be constantly amused by their antics. Truly, they deserve each other - he can't imagine either one managing a mature relationship, and he still wonders sometimes how Murdoc ever managed to get a woman to have children with him.] How appropriate. Donoghue, you must be so proud that you're apparently birthing a literal snake. Or do those honors go to Strider?

[plushaeusrumpified]

[Bro could quite honestly punch Rhys. He's ruining this special moment that Bro and Murdoc could otherwise be sharing alone. Alone, or with someone who actually gives a shit instead of someone who's just going to be a huge douchebag and ruin the whole thing. But considering the last time he punched Rhys didn't end so well, he's just going to hold himself back and not do it, even if he wants to more than anything.]

The only snake I'm gonna be birthing is a brown one in your bed tonight if you don't shut the fuck up.

[wwistful]

I'm not. It's an egg and it certainly didn't come from me. [He scowls a little.] That's an unpleasant mental image, Dirk. Do you really have to?

[He rolls his eyes at them both. Fuck you, Rhys. He's a catch. He can be charming when the subject of charm isn't some half giant potions professor with a knack for pissing him off. But it's fine, he wouldn't want to be the object of ANY sort of affection from that man.

Suddenly, as the snake seems to push his way through. Slowly. Very slowly. He can smell something strange and it hardly seems right. He sniffs the air and raises an eyebrow.]

Somethin' smells strange. [He looks straight at Dirk, of course. Only to find his gaze softening a little and a smile tugging at his lips. Nothing new, of course, but he'd thought he was better at hiding the effect Dirk seemed to have on him.]

[higherthaneverybody]

[Well, Bro has managed to surprise even Rhys - he hadn't thought the man would actually threaten to shit in his bed. Apparently he'd underestimated the juvenile nature of the blond.]

Your threats are always so naively charming- [starts, and then pauses, as he smells something odd, too. Frowning faintly, he turns to address Murdoc, and then ... oh. Oh, hmmm. That is quite the most lovely smile he's seen in a long time, and why hadn't he noticed that before?]

As amusing as this is, I do actually have business with one of you. Donoghue, if I could have a moment of your time?

[plushaeusrumpified]

[He can't help being immature sometimes. It's part of who he is, despite how much he's changed over the last several months. And Rhys just brings it out in him, what can he say?

Bro rolls his eyes at their reactions, and doesn't really say much. Yes, it was totally necessary of him to threaten to shit in Rhys's bed. The man deserves nothing less, in his opinion. Maybe he will even pee on it to match. Who knows. But still, when Murdoc smiles at him, it's hard not to smile back, but then Rhys speaks again and he just scowls.]

No you fuckin' can't have a moment with him, because if you haven't noticed, our baby is being born. This is a moment and you're stepping all over it.

And if you're smelling something, Murdoc, it's probably Rhys.

[wwistful]

[Murdoc knows Dirk has been working on being more mature, that's why goofy little comments like that still take him by surprise. However, he can sympathise with feeling the need to be childish around Rhys. Probably because Rhys is ANCIENT and he makes the whomping willow seem young.

Murdoc gives Dirk one of those sympathetic looks and reaches over, placing the egg in his hands and...not finding himself able to fight the urge to snog him as he does. The funny thing about love potions, they kind of enhance those feelings of affections.

He pulls away like he has no idea what he's doing and folds his arms over his chest, sizing Rhys up.]

I'm sure you can say it in front of Strider. We're all...professionals here. [Only that was incredibly unprofessional, oops.] Is it to do with a student?

[higherthaneverybody]

[There is a sudden flare of fierce, burning anger - pure rage, really, as the two other men kiss. It's only a lifetime of controlling himself that keeps the expression from the older man's face, while alarm bells are going off somewhere in the back of his mind - why is he so angry? Other than the fact that Strider is a disrespectful, insolent child who's been foolishly allowed to sit at the adult table while he should be-]

Yes. Professionals. I can see that public affection, threatening to defecate in my bed, and then insulting me by saying I smell, the way a four year old might, are all signs of consummate professionalism. [coolly] Yes, it's about a student, though not one of Strider's, so I don't believe it's any of his business, frankly.

[plushaeusrumpified]

[If there's one thing that could get Bro to stop focusing on his furiosity with Rhys, it's having the egg thrust into his hands and then Murdoc's lips on his own. It's such a surprise that he lets out an mmmmf and then leans into the kiss after a moment. All too soon, it feels like those lips are gone, and all he's left with is a flustered look on his face, and the hatching egg. He barely hears what Rhys says, having been sufficiently distracted from the elder man and his assholeishness.]

Wait, what? I'm a teacher here too, of course it's my business!

[And he's just nosy, really.]

But what the hell ever, can't it wait? Our fuckin' baby is hatching, if you haven't noticed! Jesus Christ you two, whatever it is isn't more important than this! [He holds out the egg for emphasis, wiggling it around slightly.] Focus, Murdoc!

Days in the past... But actually only one.

[plushaeusrumpified]

[It's stupid of him to be this excited over an egg, but he honestly can't help it. It's one of those stupid little things that he's latched onto and gotten enthusiastic over and pulled Murdoc into- though Murdoc definitely doesn't seem to mind. Maybe it's a testament to how dumb they both really are, getting excited over being parents to an egg. Sometimes it's as if Bro forgets it's even actually an egg, and ends up treating it more like a baby.

Like right now, where it's cradled in his arms and he's rocking it back and forth.]

I wish it'd fuckin' hatch already.

[wwistful]

If you keep rockin' it you're goin' to scramble it.

[He peers over at Bro from his place on the couch. It's Bro's turn to watch it, so he's sprawled out on the couch just waiting to be painted like a French girl.

He's trying to be the practical one here, but there's something endearing about raising something that isn't a dick with Bro. He's nowhere near the point of marriage or children as far as their relationship goes, but he's still enjoying this situation in a somewhat intimate way.

Probably because Bro is absolutely adorable with the egg.]

Why don't you come sit. [He says, as if he's left any space on the couch for his boyfriend and his future snake.]

[plushaeusrumpified]

[Ooh la la, he's more than ready to paint you, Murdoc. He's got his brush ready and his white paint is coming soon. If you catch his drift. Only not really, because he isn't even thinking about squirting any white paint anywhere. He is in fact too busy rocking his egg back and forth.]

Oh shush, she'll be fine, I ain't doing it hard.

[When Murdoc says that, he raises an eyebrow.]

Because you're taking up the whole damn couch, babe.

[wwistful]

There's no need for it, I doubt it's bringing it any comfort. It's an egg. [He can't help being the fun police at times, but it's true that rocking it really can't be doing more than winding Dirk up into a mothering frenzy. He rolls his eyes and pulls himself up a little, tucking his legs out of the way.]

There. She'll do a lot better if you come sit down with her.

[plushaeusrumpified]

[There is absolutely nothing wrong with Bro working himself up into a mothering frenzy. It's been a long time since he has- which actually probably makes it a bad thing, if you really think about it. Though not in his own personal opinion. He's just trying to be a good mom.]

I think you're worryin' too much.

[But nonetheless, he's getting up and moving over to sit next to Murdoc.]

You're just jealous that it likes spending time with me. Isn't that right, Celia? Yeah, daddy Murdoc is just jealous of us, isn't he?

[wwistful]

How many times do I have to remind you it's an egg before you realise it's not yet sentient? It doesn't know what it wants, you're just monopolisin' its time and mistakin' it for genuine feelin's.

[He refuses to be jealous over an egg, but he's still going to scooch closer and nuzzle his face against his neck.] She'll like me better once she hatches. We're both snakes, after all.

[plushaeusrumpified]

Oh my god you know it can hear you, right? You're making it sound like an object, but news flash. She's in there, being a little snakey fetus. She can hear everything you're saying!

[Jesus Christ he can't believe how insensitive you're being, Murdoc.]

With the shit you're saying, she's definitely going to like me better. We'll be the shining example of how a lion and a snake can be friends.

Y'know, the other example that aren't you and me.

[wwistful]

No, it can't hear me. It's not old enough to hatch and it wouldn't understand me anyway, unless I've been a parseltongue my whole life without realising.

[That would be so cool. But he sees that he's being insensitive and that it's probably bothering Bro, so he kisses his cheek and then with a great deal of wounded pride, kisses the egg.]

I had no idea you were so invested in the idea of startin' a family together. [With a snake.]

[plushaeusrumpified]

Maybe you have.

[Associated with evil wizards or not, Bro can't deny that the ability to talk to snakes is pretty damn cool. He doesn't even really understand it, honestly. Why it's such a bad thing. Evil wizards need to get something less cliche than snakes.

He can't help but grin though, as Murdoc kisses them both. But then he kinda just... sputters a little, because whoa. Whoooa.

Whoa.]

I- no! That isn't... I mean... Shut up and kiss the egg again, it was cute.

[wwistful]

I suppose we'll find out shortly. I'll have to research some nursery rhymes for our little darlin'.

[Murdoc thinks it would be very cool. Though he's already studied quite a few languages, there are none quite so badass as a secret snake language. Oh, the things you could do..

He gives him a sly grin and reaches over to kiss it again, watching him as he does it.]

I suppose we have enough children as it is, don't we? Perhaps we should invest in snake farmin'.

[higherthaneverybody]

[When Rhys shows up at Murdoc's office at four, he's figured out something's wrong. Unfortunately, he can't figure out how he came under the influence of a love spell and none of the usual antidotes seem to be doing a damn thing. He probably should go talk to Gkika or Dolores, but it's too embarrassing - he can just wait it out, it'll probably wear off in a day or two. He should also probably not show to this meeting, but ... well. A little time alone with the other man is too tempting to give up, even if nothing's going to happen. It can't hurt to talk to the other professor, can it?]

Donoghue?

[wwistful]

[Murdoc hasn't quite suspected the sudden change of heart. He knows Rhys well enough to see when he's acting off, but all he gathered from a couple of cruel jabs at himself and his partner and an insistance toward seeing him would be that he wants to discuss what they went over at the New Years Eve party. Murdoc still cringes every time he remembers Rhys yelling like that, though he isn't scared of facing him again if he wants to argue some more. Overall, he'd been too distracted by his suddenly near irresistible boyfriend and their apparent egg baby to really take note of Rhys. Yet, he's still dreading this meeting..

Still, he jumps a little when Rhys shows himself. Despite keeping an eye on the time, he'd gotten a little lost in this shambles of an essay. He composes himself and pauses to skritch a scathing note about the importance of spelling before he shifts it to the side and puts his quill down.]

Ah, Rhydderch. What was it you wanted to talk about?

[higherthaneverybody]

I actually had a proposal for you. [Rhys folds his hand behind his back, glancing around the office and not quite looking at Murdoc. He's a little afraid he'll just start staring.] Concerning lessons plans. I thought we might be more effective if we coordinated certain lectures.

[wwistful]

Oh? [He raises an eyebrow, watching Rhys carefully. Why isn't he looking at him? What is he up to? ...Oh.] You think so? [He can't help looking horribly uncomfortable at that. He doesn't want to admit that just being alone with Rhys right now is enough to make him uncomfortable.]