The slight of my hand is now a quick pull trigger

[streetsmarts]

WHO: Nick and YOU
TONE: Shifty? Sarcastic etc
RATING: PG13
WHEN:  Feb 4th
WHERE: Library, Out of grounds and around the halls
WHAT: Nick is chilling around the school and people should come bother him.
STATUS: Ongoing

[The Halls, probably near Slytherin dorms.]
[Nick has found himself a clean, empty patch in the hallway and he's making himself up a neat little one man casino. Currently he seems to be engaging in a game of solitaire, he's grumbling to himself as he does but he's actually pretty damn good at it. Honestly, he doesn't really look like he wants to be bothered, unless you happen to look like he could win some money off you. Or anything, really. Cards are more fun if you're winning against someone, afterall.]

[Out of Grounds]
[Nick is a model student. That's why he's out here lighting a smoke with his wand and hoping to God nobody catches him. It's a terrible habit, and he really should stop, but he sure as hell isn't going to appreciate being told. Or caught, for that matter.]

[Library]
[If you happen to be studying here and look like you have more than half a brain in your head, Nick is going to be seating himself in front of you and trying to coaxe you into doing his homework for him.]

Comments

[streetsmarts]

[He falls backward, not nearly strong enough to compete with the force of a bear. He drops his wand, all of the magic he never bothers to study going to complete waste in the face of actual danger.

He lets out a frustrated, pathetic sort of whimper.] Who the fuck let a bear in here.. [He struggles as she growls, swallowing his pride so he can scream at the top of his lungs.] HELP! HELP!! WHERE THE FUCK IS EVERYONE??! HELP!?

[mammas_goot_to_hyu]

[Rears up on hind-legs, hoisting Nick up into the air with a claw in his belt before transforming back into her still humongous self with a disapproving look on her face.]

[streetsmarts]

[Oh my god, this is it. This is the end. Everyone always said smoking would kill him, he just didn't think it would be like...


this.

Is that...]

Uh. Hi.

[mammas_goot_to_hyu]

[Still holding him up by the pants mid-air with one hand, just BOOMS down at him:]

Hyu shouldn't be smokink!

[Gives him a good shake for measure.]

[streetsmarts]

[God he's just...horrified and terrified right now. But he's going to try act like he isn't.

He gives her an innocent smile, scratching at the side of his face.]

Smoking? Oh lady, wow. You have the wrong idea there! I wasn't smoking!

[...] You don't need to shake me, y'know. It's just gonna make this harder.

[mammas_goot_to_hyu]

[SHAKES HARDER with a disapproving look on face.]

[streetsmarts]

What? WHAT? You don't believe me? I'm crushed.

[mammas_goot_to_hyu]

[SHAKES]

Hy vill crush hyu if hyu keep lyink und treatink me like a eediot.

[Begins walking for the castle with Nick - still carrying him by his belt loops]

[streetsmarts]

I'm not-! I wasn't? [He exhales, writhing a little as she carries him off.] I can walk.

[mammas_goot_to_hyu]

SCHTOP LYINK!

[ROAR.]

Uddervise Hy vill turn into a bear again!

[streetsmarts]

Alright! Alright! It's a filthy habit. A filthy addictive habit. Can you really be mad at me for something I can't control, miss?

--Nope. You don't need to. We got this.

[mammas_goot_to_hyu]

Goot. Vunce ve are back in de school, hyu are drinkink some Truth Serum und den ve are gettink rid ov all hyu cigarettes!

[streetsmarts]

Whyyyyy do I need to drink truth serum? We've already established that I smoke and, personally, I'm finding this all a little invasive!

You know what- No. I refuse. I want to speak to the headmaster and my head of house!

[mammas_goot_to_hyu]

No, hyu don't get dot! De headmaster und professors are busy enough. Hyu vill turn over hyu supplies und hy vill assign hyu 3 weeks detention scrubbink bed pans in de Hospital Ving!

[streetsmarts]

Wow, all of this because I have an addiction? Miss, you're cruel. This is cruel.

Anyway, I can't do that, I have a condition.

[mammas_goot_to_hyu]

Und vot iz dot condition?

[streetsmarts]

It's uh- allergies. Bed pan allergies. The stuff you scrub 'em with really does a number on my already smoke harrowed throat.

[mammas_goot_to_hyu]

Den hyu can clean de toilets. [SHAKES and marches into castle.]

[streetsmarts]

You don't have to keep shakin' me- Augh. Don't they use the same stuff for toilets? Basically the same. Can't. Sorry. Can't. Something else?

[mammas_goot_to_hyu]

Hyu vill suffer srough eet, no exception! [SHAKES and drags to Murdoc's office to lay out the charges and program his detention schedule.]

[streetsmarts]

That sounds cruel and unusual, just saying. We're in a progressive society and you're setting us back miss.

[And he will whine the whole time.]