Holiday Ghost Event: Road Less Traveled

[shnpc]

WHO: Everyone, affected and not
TONE: Not of this world
RATING: PG
WHEN: December 11th through 12th
WHERE: Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry
WHAT: Due to visiting holiday ghosts, some students and staff find themselves living as they would have if something in their lives did or didn't happen. An alternate version who could be better or worse off!
NOTE: This signals the event start. Use any posting format you want, and feel free to post about this as well on the journals!

Comments

[3potionproblem]

Two years give or take a few months.

[3houseswatson]

[John nods.]

I've got a question. A lot of people might think it kind of flippant given what all's happening, but right now I'm finding it very hard to give a damn about any of that.

Did the me who didn't die ever get a growth spurt?

[3potionproblem]

[Sherlock pauses because.... oh good lord.... He smiles a little.]

Maybe an inch.

[3houseswatson]

Well, shit.

If he's still alive, maybe he's not done growing yet.

[3potionproblem]

No, you're done, I'm rather sure.

[3houseswatson]

[John crosses his arms over his chest, a sour expression on his ghostly face.]

And what makes you such an expert?

[3potionproblem]

I'm your age.

[3houseswatson]

So? Not everyone's done growing by age 16.

[3potionproblem]

Fine then. Your hands. You have small hands. They'd be disproportionate in an adult who was sized larger than you are now.

[Holds up his hand for comparison.]

And before you begin your next argument, hands and feet grow first leaving the body to catch up.

[3houseswatson]

[John looks at his hands, then buries his face in them in frustration. Even as a ghost, he can still do a good face-palm.]

And I thought my last girlfriend was just teasing when she said she used her own hands as models when she knitted me mittens for Christmas.

[3potionproblem]

Well, I'm not saying you have women's hands but they are proportionate to your size.

[3houseswatson]

Yeah, that's all well and good... unless people start asking if everything is proportionate.

[3potionproblem]

You're only about eight centimeters shorter than average height. I think most people would still assume an average of 12 to 15 centimeters erect. Wouldn't be too worried about it unless you mean to imply average is a generous overestimation or a inaccurate belittlement.

[3houseswatson]

[One good thing about being a ghost is there's really no need to blink. So John can just stare in slightly slack-jawed shock as long as he likes.]

... did you really... just... what.

[3potionproblem]

[Sherlock is a bit confused but whatever.]

We don't have to talk about your penis. You're the one who brought it up. Well, you mentioned it.

[3houseswatson]

Only because there's all kinds of stereotypes about size of hands and feet and how it relates to... that!

But yes, please, let's not talk about it. If this is the kind of conversation you get into with the alive me, I don't even know what to think.

[3potionproblem]

Funly enough, your penis has never come up in conversation before. Given your current reaction to it, I'm rather sure it won't either. It's not exactly useful information anyway.

[3houseswatson]

And if you're right and the living me comes back, I hope it never becomes useful information.

[He sighs, a dry and hollow sound that probably comes with the territory of being a ghost.]

You're absolutely sure nothing can be done to stop this sooner? Get the me you're used to back alive and well and get me... well. Not here, like this.

[3potionproblem]

We're not a couple.

[Sherlock looks the ghost over but... yeah, no, that's definitely a ghost.]

I don't know how to bring people back from the dead. Just have to trust for now that the castle will make things right.

[3houseswatson]

Good. Er... that probably came out a bit wrong. Not 'good' in the sense that, y'know, that that kind of thing is inherently bad or anything. Just. It'd be... unexpected. If that were the case. Which you say it's not! So kind of a pointless thing to think about at all, right?

[Dead and awkward, could this day get any better?]

Yeah, well, please excuse my lack of faith in the castle right now. It better put things right, or I'm going to go full stereotype haunting on it. I'll find some chains to rattle and everything.

[3potionproblem]

Right. Don't worry, I don't lose any sleep over you not finding me attractive.

[He smiles. No awkward here.]

What will you do in the interim?