Stop and smell the grass

[innocent_insanity]

WHO: Kurloz Makara
TONE: somewhat macabre
RATING: PG-13
WHEN: 13 October, early evening
WHERE: Library
WHAT: Kurloz is taking advantage of Hogwarts' massive library and delving into the medical biology section. (btw he's not wearing his makeup, just his eyeliner)
STATUS: ONGOING

Kurloz had decided to spend the majority of his Saturday sketching. Not completely unusual, and some of the sketches had even been lighthearted ones of the outdoor scenery. He'd even bothered to collect one of the autumn leaves and draw it out in exquisite detail, but then he'd gotten lost in the veins of the plant. Veins had led to thoughts of blood, and blood had led to here, the library, in the shadowy section on biology. He hadn't bothered with the general Healing tomes - he'd gone straight for the titles regarding the transformation and distortion of anatomy through spellwork, staring fascinated at the images depicting various gruesome twisted creatures and failed experiments.

He sat at one of the desks, several of the books piled at his arm as he scanned through one in front of him, eyes fixated on the detailed water-coloured painting of two wizards that had been merged to share one spine, both of their faces in agony as the writer noted that the subjects had not lasted long under the pain.

Comments

[grandhighwizard]

Rhys looked down at the picture with a hard to read expression for a long few moments, then one corner of his mouth quirked up in a subtle half-smile. "Is it just the pain? Or any ... extreme experience or sensation?"

[innocent_insanity]

Well that certainly required a more clear response, so out came the notebook and pencil. He paused for a moment longer before scribbling down:

both

[grandhighwizard]

"An unusual thing for a boy your age to be curious about," the man remarked, though he didn't sound disapproving. His dark eyes flicked to Kurloz's mouth thoughtfully, then up to the boy's eyes. "Any particular reason?"

[innocent_insanity]

He lowered his eyes when he saw Rhys' own glance at his mouth, suddenly uncomfortable at this huge professor and his questions. Still, he hadn't asked anything rude per se...

The pencil spun lazily between his long fingers before he finally began writing, a bit slower than before:

a brother's been mighty curious about how different people up and react under pain. these ones [taps at the drawing of the men] didn't last none too long but some of the others in this here book got right and proper changed by it. and not just in looks.

[grandhighwizard]

"Trauma does that," Rhys agreed. "Any extreme emotion, especially suffered over longer periods of time: pain, anger ... fear. Terror especially can leave an indelible mark on the soul. All these things are a kind of crucible, a testing ground, if you will."

He rested his hand on the table, and pulled the book towards himself, flipping through the pages. It wasn't a book he'd read before, but he was sure he would find ... yes. Here. He stopped on a woodcut of a woman whose legs, it seemed, had been transfigured into some kind of metal - it was hard to tell from the illustration, but they were clearly no longer flesh. She was standing in a small fire, and the flames licked up around her thighs. Her face was turned to the sky, and there was an expression of both pain there, but also a kind of beatific ecstasy, as though she saw something beyond just the physical. Smiling to himself, he pushed the book back to Kurloz.

[innocent_insanity]

Kurloz watched curiously as Rhys turned the pages, wondering what the man was looking for. He certainly spoke of some pretty interesting things that somehow seemed to resonate with Kurloz (which he knew on some level should be disturbing him), and he couldn't help but want to hear more.

When the book was turned back to him, the boy's eyes widened with awe and he stared at the woman's face, flicking down at what had once been her legs and back up to the expression twisting her features. Without realising it his fingers had moved to trace along the lines of the woodcut print reverently.

[grandhighwizard]

Rhys watched the boy's face intently - he'd known there was something intriguing about Kurloz, but this was beyond what he'd expected. The resonance in the child's face told him that the Slytherin had understood immediately, and that was a rare thing in an adult, let alone someone his age. He had to be cautious, but he had a feeling about this one. Something in his gut that told him there was something special here.

"And that's only physical pain. One of the crudest tools available for the scourging of the soul, for distilling the essence of a person into what they truly are," he said softly. "Theoretically."

[innocent_insanity]

Kurloz's eyes were riveted to the page and his hands began to sign out slowly 'there's more?' before he realized who he was signing to. He snapped out of his reverie and glanced up at Rhys with huge eyes, wetting his lips nervously before writing his previous question on the notebook. Slight apprehension mixed with keen hunger for knowledge were battling it out in his mind but he let none of it show on his face, only his eyes barely showing signs of the emotions as they kept flicking from Rhys' face to the picture of the woman.

[grandhighwizard]

There wasn't any genuine fear there, at least not of him. Rhys has a fine sense for that sort of thing, and the lip licking made the nervousness obvious, but Kurloz wasn't frightened of him, the way many other students would be. No, he thought more that the boy was actually curious, and wondered how he'd gotten Sorted into Slytherin, of all places.

"Yes. Much more. Subtle magics and brutal traumas and everything in between. Is this something you're interested in learning about, Mr. Makara?"

[innocent_insanity]

Kurloz took a moment to think on that, a faraway look entering his eyes that grew heavy-lidded with quiet contemplation. His jaw worked minutely to lightly bring his teeth over the tip of his tongue and he withdrew into himself. He lowered his head and focused on his hands, expression growing haunted as he remembered Meulin's screaming, fingers curling into white-knuckled fists that prevented him from responding to the question.

[grandhighwizard]

"Or something you have personal experience in?" Rhys asked, his voice quieter, but nonetheless probing. He clearly had no problem with personal questions, and not in the way Dolores Maryam had, of kindly interest or a need to soothe. Rhys was a man who was used to his questions being answered, and that was clear from his tone - there was nothing aggressive or pushy in it, there simply didn't have to be.

[innocent_insanity]

Kurloz's shoulders jerked and he continued to stare at his hands, a low tremor going through him as the memory of that incident rose up. Fear, anger, determination, sheer adrenaline, it was all too easy to taste on his tongue. He distantly felt his jaw moving, ready to bite down, and his hand flew up, jamming his knuckles between his teeth. The sharp pain was just enough (not the same, there shouldn't be bone) and he collected himself, taking a breath and lowering his hand again.

The look he gave Rhys was bland, even if his eyes were a bit wild, a bit eager. He calmly wrote:

maybe

[grandhighwizard]

Rhys smiled, and there was something wolfish in it. "You should remember for the future, lad, that 'maybe' is always a damning answer."

But though the look on Kurloz's face was bland, it was impossible to miss all the other blindingly clear body language - the shoulders, the knuckles in the mouth. If he was trying to hide, he wasn't trying very hard, and the Potion's professor thought this was something he was more ambivalent about. Perhaps he wanted to explain, but was sensibly cautious.

"But it was hardly a question I needed to ask, was it? Tell me, Mr. Makara, what did it do to you?"

[innocent_insanity]

Kurloz's eyes narrowed, just a tad, and he slowly wrote:

i think you're not one of them folks who'll up and damn me so quick.

Perhaps it was insolent, but something about the way Rhys was nudging him made Kurloz feel sure that this was something he and the gigantic man could connect on. It might have been that which then coaxed him to respond to the question in a rather... incautious way. The dark little part of his mind that he'd repressed since it'd made itself known with the incident was uncurling and lazily spreading, if only for an instant.

His lips slowly spread into a small, secretive and wolfish smile, eerily similar to Rhys' own without Kurloz realizing it.

[grandhighwizard]

"And what makes you think that, m'bach?" Rhys asked, not accusingly or disapprovingly, but curiously. He wanted to know this boy's thought process, why Kurloz seemed to trust him.

[innocent_insanity]

The smile quickly vanished and Kurloz gave Rhys a measured look before writing his simple answer.

you gone and be bothering to show a brother this instead of sending me right on over to the hospital wing.

He tapped the open historical transfiguration book before him, indicating the picture of the woman with metallic legs.

[grandhighwizard]

"Why would I send you to the hospital wing? You're not ill. Merely possessed of a more open and inquisitive mind than most children your age. And it is my job to educate, after all."

He glanced down at the book again. "Even if it's a bit off curriculum."

The man straightened again, and tapped one long finger against his lower lip thoughtfully. "Are you interested in lessons? Or is this a merely idle curiosity?"

[innocent_insanity]

Kurloz stared up at him with mild confusion before writing out:

you can get lessons on this stuff?

Then, just because he was a tad wary of the enigmatic Potions professor, he hesitated before adding:

why're you so up and interested in m this?

[grandhighwizard]

Rhys considered the boy for a long moment, thinking. Then he shook his head. "No. I think not. You'll have to take a leap of faith."

"If you're interested, you should be aware of the location of my office and the hours I keep, Mr. Makara. I inform all my students at the beginning of term. Avail yourself of them or not, as you like." He smiled again, then, that predatory grin, full of teeth, that Kurloz's own smile was such an echo. "Good day to you, my lad."

[innocent_insanity]

Kurloz stared up at that vicious smile, absently thinking in the back of his mind that he should be terrified of this man, and on some level he was, but for all the wrong reasons. That face itself didn't scare him - it was what he was being invited to do, to take the dark knotted rabbit hole deep into the part of himself that he'd been shying away from for the past year.

Conflicted, he nodded mutely, expression devoid of emotion as he slowly lifted his hand to flap-out in the sign for farewell, mouthing out 'good day' automatically.